=)

YoYo~ I think piyo is the only one reading this now. Haha. If there is anyone else reading this, please let me know. It may or may not affect my blogging habit .... from seldom...to barely seldom? =)

Pretty much forgot about everything before my holis, just that I'm gonna do badly for my exams. Anyway, went for the 3days Judo camp. Nothing sort of EXTRAordinary, just EXTRA tired, since I had been missing for trainings for a month. Yea, sorta dis-motivated. Gaming is so much easier. Just need a chair and move little fingers only. Understand my power-saving scheme?

Let's talk about the camp. Was late for the first day due to yaling not wanting to wake up. LoL. Slept late due to late packing. But she stil forgot to bring her sleeping bag the next day. ^^ whatever.... and she brought her wippo there!! ^^ whatever... AND.. ya.. I acted like a big shot being very late. HoHoHO! Merry Xmas. Enough of side tracking. Normal training after that, then there was this black belter, Ivan sensei. I don't really agree with his goal. Nxt para.

He said, "The most important part of competition is to win." yea, seems alright. ",even if you play dirty." ok, not fine with me. Is he being too honest? Nah, dont like him, but I will stil use his technique. Hees. I'm a hypocritc..argh how you spell that.. h-i-p-p-o-p-o-t-a-m-u-s... hmm seems right.. Anyway, he taught for an owl only cuz he's a busy man. ^^

Night run concludes the first day. Food sucks except for a few meals, drinks ok except for a few meals, not enough supper. ^^ Save me from saying all this later.

5am 2nd day, Mr Francis woke us up for morning run. Rain in SINGAPORE!! Get the tix! Nah, it was a rainy morning but stil he wanna run. So be it. I'm a very team guy. Everyone go! YooSH! Ran to Pierce reservoir from NYP. Boring. Too boring. The big problem is.. not everyone is as fit as one and other. Then we have to wait and wait and wait. I dont really feel like running. Anyway, the rain made my shoe as wet as a soaked seaweed after the whole thing, so I threw it away. Adidas FTW.

Btw, Francis was not supposed to be in the picture for the camp. So, somehow, some OBVIOUS way, SOMETHING not nice happened. Not going to elaborate, but I don't feel too good if someone was to overwrite my plan.

2nd night ended after training at Katong. Yeah, went out to our sensei's dojo. Small but cosy. Cool skills taught and learnt. By now, body isn't feeling too well. Aching.

3rd day, we went to train at Bishan Park Sec. Woo, I know they will be good. But I didnt know we suck that much. Secondary is the prime time for you to really join a cca and learn something. Poly is just too much of a hassle. Anyway, I used a technique learnt from katong and choked a guy from BPS. ^^ happy! yeah. modified tech. but I didnt play with that sensei from BPS. bad feeling. Lols.

Took a cab back and rest. Then swam. Then watch a stupid show, which no one wants to watch except me. Then Xmas xchange. Then end. Nothing much. LoL.

End End End End End End End.

Did I lack out lotsa of stuffs? haha. I know I know. Nvm larrzz. Post too long le.

New.

Great. I'm back again. Don' think there is anyone reading my blog anymore. After a long period of pausesage. Whatever that word means. Somehow my tagboard had been taken down by fooble. Great. Cus no one wants to even scold me for not blogging.

Joseph Ng Jun Wei is very tired. Yea. I want to...[omg.. my english is so bad tht i cant find the correct phrase,word,sentence.] VENT my frustation. Somehow, I know I cant carry on my life like this anymore. Like what? Like playing games everyday, like wanting to play everyday, like wanting to sleep every moment. like....I got the feeling that I will be unfaithful to my girl. Like I want all distinctions for my studies but not still slacking like last sems. Like wasting money on my girl. Like wasting my time on frigging transports due to the that.

Ok. No. It's not my girl's fault. I think a good guy wouldn't mind a girl wanting to be with him every moment. I'm just not good enough, and I hate being clamped between friends, girl and games. For my sake, please avoid causing me to enter such dilemma, cause I might just freak out and screw everyone.

Privacy, room for me to write my tots. Nah.. this is not the place. I don't want to get my girl upset when/if some mofo/SOBs proceed to tell my girl about my rantings. Nah, no one I can talk to. Guys are bad listeners and girls are ...well... my girl get jealous pretty fast. I'm tired. Tired. I hate the "Do you love me?" stuffs. Does 3 words prove anything? I rather find someone to read my heart, then to get myself to try to understand myself.

Yeah, I'm a loser that don't know what HE wants. Except for pleasures without effort, free money, free food, everlasting time.. I'm tired.

I don't think I want a useless tagboard. Just send me comments thru msn. maybe I would create another blog to post my tots. Tired.

ESP

oseph, when it comes to psychic abilities, you have an unusually strong talent in the area of Remote Viewing

This means you have an uncanny ability to travel great distances with your mind, to virtually any location, and actually get a true glimpse at what is located there. The best conditions for traveling space with your mind, or remotely viewing another location, are silence and a calm state of mind. Even without these conditions, you managed to show considerable talent in this area, which is called remote viewing. This skill is phenomenally valuable and has been used by institutions such as the government to help in covert operations designed to retrieve information about the whereabouts of a criminal or to learn about the operations of another country. But mostly this can help in practical, everyday ways, such as instinctively grabbing an umbrella before making a trip to the next town over even though you had no way of knowing that it was raining there.

Joseph, the thing you need most in a relationship is Deep Connection

In your ideal relationship you and you partner would be deeply and passionately connected. This sense of intimacy is really important for you. As is the need for certain rules and an understanding of who wields the power in your relationship. But regardless of how this works, your deep need for this kind of closeness will ultimately drive your relationship.

----------------------------------

Joseph, you're Calm, Cool, and Collected

Do your friends like to lean on your shoulder? Ask you for advice in life and love? Put you on speed-dial for emergencies? We bet they do. You're as balanced as they come. When it comes to making decisions, you're not afraid to take the time to weigh your options carefully in order to make the right choice. And it takes more than a few obstacles to rattle your cool head.The good news is that you've also got lots of heart, and you make sure that people know that you always have their backs. There's almost nothing more important to you than the people in your life, so being a support to them is the coolest thing around. Just like you.

Joseph, you're a Bashful Kisser

Sure you might be on the shy side as far as kissing goes, but that's a quality more people than you might think really go for. When you were younger, was it hard for you to talk to new people — especially when it came to someone you were interested in? Yeah, we thought so.Lucky for you, many people, back then, and now, think that shyness is adorable and a huge turn on. After all, there's a comfort they get from the feeling that you don't lock lips with just anyone.When it comes to kissing, you're probably a little hesitant to try new techniques. Heck, you might even prefer to stick with gentle pecks until your date finally decides to take it further.While shyness is nice, just remember not to get so anxious you forget to have fun! Know your comfort level, but experiment a little — even if that just means a public display of affection, or we dare you, a nice long kiss — eyes open, lights on!

-------------------

Joseph, you're fit to commit because you know what you want

You don't need us to tell you that you're on the right track. A cool and confident person, you know what you want; now it's just a matter of finding it. Even more important, you know that love is about much more than what kind of clothes they wear or car they drive. And you're ready to make it work.You've gotten to a place where you are happy with your life, and you're ready to share it with someone special. So whether you've found them or are still looking, know that this time, you'll get what you want.

monday

First day of the break. Mmm. not really.. but it's monday. The blues.

Chatted with yaling the whole day yesterday. No life. Yeah. Time passed quickly with games and it was midnight already. So.. Yeah.Slept at 4.30. Woke up at 1.30? Should be around there. Haha.

2 hours had passed. Did nothing significant. Smsed yaling. Talked to Juey. (He's damm bored and asking for ppl to go out) Talked to JY. Auntie Joyce talking to me now. (Mrs Polar.) LoL. So yeah. I'm bored.

Let's write abt last Friday. Met up with Leo, Yaling for cheap lan-ing. In the end it wasn't. Usual rate. Played til 11.30pm. Tekka mall. Somewhere at Little India. haha. Then, erm, we decided to walk walk. Because Worm dont wanna go home. (figure it out) We walked to city from there? Gosh. Shaws tower. Bugis. Then we were lost at Cityhall. Haha. We decided to go Cineleisure to watch midnight show. erm. Yeah. Wandered. Stopped and ate a 7-11 store. Not bad. (typo. yea. we ate a store.)

Walking and walking. Erm, we got to cineleisure? Thanks God! Yea, because He didnt rain fireballs at us. Anyway, we reached there at 2am? lol. Benchwarmers at 2am slot. Chiong in ah!! YL was like wanting to watch horror movie. Yea. To my horror, we didn't. =] Benchwarmers. Retarded nipper twister! WooT! Laugh. Retards.

Anyway, after that, 3.30? Decided to pool? Walk over to.. erm.. Dhoby again. Wanted to bring them to a place where I went last time during Joanna's bdae. Remembered the route. somehow. Woot. The place had being closed. Wth. Then I toppled a stone pillar. [ lol. x) ] Angry! Nah. So, we figured that we could take the Night Riders to wander around. 3 dollars to everywhere. How cool? Took NR6 at Park Mall. All fell aslp. Shoo-ed down at Pan Pac Hotel.

We waited for bus. 4.30am. Hey, why aren't the bus stopping. Puzzled. THEN WE FINALLY KNOW THAT NIGHT RIDER SERVICE ENDS AT 430AM. GO TO HELL. MYUK! lol. damm.
So, we went to sleep around.. to wait for MRT service to start. Hotel. SHooed. Citybank ATM WOOT!! SLept!! Hee. =] COol. Cold airconditioning. Woke up at 6. Left me and YL there. Where's leo. -_-" and who is that couple there? Angmoh and Chinese CB. =X Faster wake up and went to look for leo. Paiseh sia. my god. Leo came back from the toilet.

Went down to Citylink. COntinue sleeping at. erm the cafe near MPH. Okie. Shooed. Fine. SIngapore is not wanderer friendly. Yaling came back with us to Woodlands. Me and leo had a change of clothes. Then we went to eat breakfast at Vista point. Followed by a walkwalk at NTUC civil and then CWP. LoL. YL reserved a shoe. (just one. (jking)) Leo went home to sleep.

Then I sent YL home. Afternoon. Slept over til around 5pm. Went to buy cup noodles and had it as lunch. Stayed there til 7pm. haha. Then I went home to sleep. End of friday.

Cool. Adios.

=]

Wednesday.

Well well, 4 days since I last blogged. Had been busy cum lazy. You should know the feeling of not wanting to doing anything after a long day. yea.

Nothing unusual happened. Caught a movie with Pris today. Xmen. =] COol show. All the effects. The storyline is good too. bah. But.. there's some parts that feel like a horror movie, and then some parts are arousing. Oh well. =] *woohooo*

Haha.. about my feelings. It's still the same. No. No one in particular. Looking through the choices. No one is really that special yet. That's how I'm feeling now. No matter how cute or pretty or nice, there's aways better. I'm not sure what I'm searching for. VOID. Unstable.

But I know I'm still yearning for someone that I can/would like or love or.. whatever...care.. Damm. I'm just lazy.

And, school works. Boring boring. Maplestory is better. -_-" at least I can stay at home. Don't feel like going anywhere. Tests, projects, practicals. I can do them. But..

That's pretty much about all. [Maybe it will all ends up with passes and move on to the nxt sems. (I can never get into university bah)]

Cya.

Saturday.

Saturday.

Sleep.

End. Adios.

Friday NC

Friday.

Skipped school because I know that I had excuse letter today. Wahahah. =] Went to school at 1230 for MAD! Hmm. Okie.Then we realised that MAD is part of the Buzz carnival. Stores selling stuffs? And there wasn't really any buzz. Empty sports hall. =]

Performance was fine. Silat was really good. Taekwondo erms.. Kickboxing, cool seniors with qi gong. Akikido...cultural.. Kendo not bad, too much speech though. Judo, haha, I dont know =P But, I'm sick of Mortal Combat.

Went home to prepare for night cycling. Wee, late. =X haha. Took tAxi down to ECP EAST COAST PARK. Waited at Macs. Oh right.. Subi, Leo, Jeremy, Wanshi, Pris, Scott, Phelan, JunJie, Kenny, Wee hong, Aydeng, Dennis, Tyler, Ah tan, and me. LoL. Went to take the bike after we gathered. $7 overnight. Started cycling at 9.

First stop, ECP hawker. LoL. Ate first. Some ate at Macs already. Then we continue the biking to City area. Stadium Road, Nicole highway. 2nd stop, War memorial. Chopsticks. Yeah, this was sorta of a educational tour. Aydeng as the guide. =] Then we went on to other various places. Fullerton, Merlion, Esplanade, Supreme Court. Historical sites.

We had supper at Lao Pa Sa. Then we went on to Tiong bahru, Railway station. lol. I not exactly sure of the name. -_-" But we got there. The place is really old though. Then...We went back? Haha. Memory loss after a sleep. =X Some of us take turns to go missing. Too slow, stopped by traffic, traffic light etc. LoL. =] haha Fun. Oh yea. Leo had a cramp. Then he was really slow for the rest of the journey. Guess he cycled at gear 1 for too long. lol. Wasted.

Ending. We chionged all the way from City to Bedok Jetty. I'm 2nd. LoL. Then my legs really cant take it anymore. Guess I really peddled hard. Anyway, All of us sit at the jetty. Had fun. Talked crap. Some nearly fell asleep. I napped for around 5-10mins. Then I did breakfalls. Er, it hurts. The others do with me. I think they hurt more. HA! Taji session. QA session. =] Sunrise. Too cloudy. But.. it's really good, with all the company.

Went to return bikes at 7am. Walked to Macs. Some ate. Then we splited up in taxis and went home. Whew. Tired. Taxi uncle..really nice. charged only $20. Saved $1.20. Think he felt bad about not knowing the route. Showered. Creamed. Sleep. Home Sweet Home.

Bye.

The Do You Act Your Age Test

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=6263079427778143051

TeenybopperYou scored 30 Age 4-8, 115 Age 8-12, 387 13-17, and 338 18+!
How old are you again, 13? Grow up please, being childish isn't attractive!

okie. This should take up a new post. Who cares. I'm in the range of 13-17. So, its quite accurate? HA!

u

The Are You Interesting? Test
http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=15680802765629144619

Excited TerrierYou scored 47!
You might have a spark of interest in you, but we can't really be sure. You've scored square in the middle. It'd probably behoove you to either get outside more or use your brain a bit more often, whatever the case may be.

4th quiz. =] No idea again.......

z

The Seven Deadly Sins Test
http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=10058428466864441281

PrideYou scored 50 externality and 34 desire!

You're proud, and you should be...proud. Um, yeah. Dante described Pride as a "love of self perverted to hatred and contempt for one's neighbor." It's hard not to love yourself, though, because you're probably just that awesome. Pride is also referred to as Vanity (like that dead, mutilated model in Se7en). The funny thing is, Pride is supposed to be the "worst" sin, but I think it has a lot of positive connotations in American culture. Patriots are proud! Soccor moms are proud! Pride is sort of the conservative, upper middle class sin...

I don't quite get this. But...

The Hentai Testhttp://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=15844491276623588375

Male CharacterYou scored 50%

You are definitely in the action, but when the lead comes along you back down and let them do what they will. While the story might not focus around you, you've definitely got some good screen time.
You are on your way to becoming a real hentai, you aren't quite there yet but keep watching and you will get there. Go for it!

Er, hey, dont screw me. Just doing some quiz. TEEEHEEE!!! OMG.

test

Quietly ExtrovertedCongratulations! You scored 34!

You love going out and having a good time, be it with a large group of friends or your significant other, however, you don't mind chilling out either. You'd be better off living in the city, but the outskirts of a major town is good too. You're capable of holding an intelligent conversation if the mood really strikes you. You're not quite as annoying to an introvert, but could be if you don't learn when they're not in the mood for talking. You're willing to try new things and if necessary, can keep a secret.

The Introvert/Extrovert Testhttp://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=7727758359986668519

ha? oh well. =]

Monday

Oh man. Had been sick since Friday. Wonder if it has to do with Juey's 100 plus, or my lack of sleep. Anyway, m using a new acne cream. Costed me $30++ at the polyclinic. Skipped lesson to go there on Friday.

Monday. So Sianz. Late night gaming. Very tired. Sleep. Woke up tired. SICKED. DAmm. Don't feel like going and my mother was disturbing. me. Oh well. Skipped 9am lecture. AGAIN. Don't feel like going 10. Went for 11. Was feeling uncomfortable, while sleeping on train. Tried so hard to control my coughing.

Reason: Don't wanna get attention from my coughing. =]

Fell back asleep when the train is at Khatib. Oh well, I'm stupid. Woke up at AMK. OMFG. Got down, and took another back. Bumped onto Yaling on the train. =] Cool. Didn't talk much to her, wasn't feeling that well during that moment. But it made me realised that I shouldn't go gloomy whole day. Thanks for the quiet reminder. The rest of the day was plain. I just slept. Running nose. Gcks! Sickening. *cough cough*

Went home. Watched School Rumble. Were very tired but feel like I should watch abit. Felt asleep gradually. Woke up at 830, surprisingly, no one chatted or leave a msg. That's sorta new. Watched more rumble and wait for someone to talk. Then Dota!! yea. Only guys would talk to me now. How sad. =(

Anyway, pretty much about all. Crapping now with LaME BROS and JY. Sianz. Showered. Feeling much better. Gotta apply new cream.

Adios.

Sunday.

Secrets. Anonymous. What kind of secrets do you wanna know?

On my feelings? What's there to hide when I feel nothing now. I know I want a gf. That's all. But I'm picky. And I'm lazy. And I sucks at this. What else? Oh yeah, and I'm bored.

About my friends? Hmm, nah.

My family. No secrets either. At least I don't know about it.

On how I pass even when I'm not studying. Ask God.

Health. I'm sick. Cough. Tired.

I hate wasting time trying to feel how others feel. Not exactly hate. Just that it's tearing me down. And I hate mistakes.

I hate pimples. I'm vain.

I'm not facing any problems now. Not academically nor emotionally. I think.

I sucks at cheering people up. Because people sucks at cheering me up. Or rather I'm too easily cheered up that I think eveyone's the same and I'm damm fucked by people who turned to bite me when I can't do the same.

Fine fine.

Adios.

*incomplete*

Sat

Saturday already. Wow. Time passes quick.

No, I wasn't really busy. Just..Er, need to do something else. Tere would be times when I will be here, then left with a empty post. Yea, didn't put those posts up for obvious reason. Just one. Ask me for the reason. =]

Judoing Judoing, skipping lessons. What else can I do? Studying, reading or.. hmm getting a girlfriend [ good idea=) ], getting a job [ even better ] [NAH!] and well.. more Judo. Haha, Judo might become the equivalent of basketball during my sec school life. I'm still procrastinating about lots of stuffs. LOTS. HA!

Lots of stuffs happened this few days while I wasn't here blogging. Man, Nah, don't feel like writing them down. Stuffs that let me think and know. Makes me think more and more. Humans are weird creatures. Fascinating. yeah, I'm inhuman. =]]

Guess I'm really longwinded about what I think about stuffs. Ha, just read my blog. =] It's ME! My writing style. And yea, I leave infomations out here and there. Not a good story writer. But I create suspense! Bad puncutation too. =] Lots of thought bubbles. See? Another paragraph about me. =]

Update again. I'm starting to feel unloving.

Joseph, the emoticon that represents you best is the Sticking-Tongue-Out Face

What's so funny? You are! That's why the emoticon that represents you best is as good-humored as you.

Woah, Cool. Accurate. Yeah, I'm bored. =P xP x) =]

=]

Work like you don't need the money.

Love like you've never been hurt.

Dance like nobody's watching.

Sing like nobody's listening.

Live like it's Heaven on Earth.

Sunday

Hmm, Saturday was Judokas movie gathering. haha. Booked ticket for Davinci Code. Cool. Was late though. Supposed to meet at 2 at Marina Square. But I left at 2pm from Woodlands. Haha. To collect tix, so it was fine. =] I suppose. Come flame me if it's not.

The movie was great. As in, at least it's still a movie. WTH I'm talking about. Did enjoy the show. Heard alot of disputes over the issues about true history and true christianity shit. Whatever guys. It's only a movie. Moreover, to me, history is just stuffs recorded by humans. Mother Nature don't write nor preaches. But She preserves stuffs from the past nevertheless. Not a pagan. Nor a scientist. Let me go back in time, and through that should I believe written history.

=] Went walking around after that. Walk walk. OMG. Nvm. I was abit tired. Wonder why. Maybe my body feel like resting alot on weekends. BTW. The walking around is not held at Marine Sq..but from..there.. to Mustafa. to Jalan Beser. Horne road[horny]. then Jalan Besar Swim pool then back. Ended at.. Lavender? LoL. But it was still fun nevrtheless. Jokes all the way. Laughed. =] alot.

Skipped alot of stuffs. =] It's a good Sat day. Sunday boredom.

Friday.

Nice. Came back to blog. What did I miss out? Er, Getting my orange belt. Tagboard annouced. Thurs lan with leo, polar, chin and yaling. 8dollar plus. -_-"

Friday. Got my 1st warning letter. Woah. It's only been 2 months since school started? damm. Okie. Had been missing too much lessons and lecturers had been catching people. Can't they understand that even if I don't go for class, I can still get good grades if I had wanted to, and even if I go for class, if I had not wanted to study, I would still fail? Yea, we need some understanding.

Stayed back after school. Was wanting to go get a job application with Yaling. Hmm, some lobangs recently. =] but her manager wasn't there today so had to cancel. Then I remembered that there was Kendo exchange program with some Jap school as well as NUS. So, I stayed to take a look. Sat around for 3hrs plus? Walked abit too. haha. A distinctive differences in training style is their discipline. Organised. Less fun (fooling around)? I'm NOT critizising. =]

Anyway, it is still cool. During their training, I would be able to see this silly girl. Stamping her foot while waiting for her turn to come. Sorta recognised her before her stamping. But the stamping style confirmed it. Guess she's too nervous or excited to wait without moving. Yea, refering to JY. Everything was fine. I was crapping on the 2nd floor with Leo and ZhiLi till I noticed a crowd.

Someone had a accident. Got a feeling. Saw the someone with armour and everything unable to move. Is it her? Yeah, it's JY. In pain. Had a fall. Saw her removed all her armour and start rubbing her leg. Then I could see her disappointment in her face, and her limping around. Did it really hurt that much? Do you think you wanna try forcing yourself to train still, since it's going into the more important part? [from my point of view] But, yea, it never came out. It wuld had sounded very wrong. And, since you are really in pain, don't force.

Damm, mixed feeling. Why cant it be someone else who get injured? Then I wouldnt had bother that much. Did a uber stupid thing. I went down to talk to her. I knew she wasn't feeling too good, so I thought it would be better to talk to her and try to distract her from her pain and to also know how bad was the injury. [but yea, I know nuts about reliefing pain so it was pretty pointless too. But is there another way to show concern? hais] I felt abit out of place already when I was there, cause I wasn't supposed to? Talked abit.

TaK! Tak! TAK! Another girl came crushing down on JY after tripping on her. She was resting there, and I was at the side. I think I manged to push and prevent that girl to sit on JY's painful leg? Then... Ah. hais. I was smiling and sorta laughing due to the clumsiness of that girl who came thumbling on JY and also JY's having a unlucky day. Then yea, before I say anything else, JY tells me to go away. !!!!!shocked!!!? oh no. I realised you are angry. But I didn't say sorry. Caused I know you just misunderstood me. Maybe if I said sorry during then, it might help, but..grr. damm reflex. I don't react fast enough.

Seriously. I didn't know that you would get angry. I knew you are disappointed, but what would be the best reaction that I should had have? Should I had reprimanded that senior for not watching where she's moving? No. She didn't do that on purpose. Should I be showing concern and asking if you are alright? I tried, but I laughed first, and I was condemmed. Okie, I'm finding excuses for myself. I'm sorry. Just don't be angry with me? not that much can?

I wasn't laughing about your aspiration for Kendo. Wasn't disrespecting you. Wasn't looking down on you. Was trying to see you smile because I know that laughing and smiling are addictive. Was trying to wipe off your disappointed look from your face. Was trying to encourage you to go join the training no matter how painful it is.

I know the importance. Yeah. But I couldn't feel the pain. So, I don't have the right to say that. I'm just sorry?

Went back with Leo after that. And a hybrid Judokendoka. -_-" Saw JY around before leaving. Didnt say a thing. The look on her face. Can only say a bye to her.

Then I'm home. =] Played a few rounds of dota. Actually only 2. Not bad. Didnt think too much. Goodnite.

Saturday

Yo. Sat. Sleeping and sleeping. Nothing else for me to do. There's some reports I need to do. I know, but no. What to do, how should I start. Playing game. It's boring. Missing some elements. Some feelings.

=] Getting tired I think. Getting tired of crapping with people. Getting tired to think of how should I be joking with them. I just wanna keep myself shut. There was times where I smses alot to anyone, everyone. That changed. Chatting on msn.. ha..

Yeah. This is a depressing entry. =] Weak smile. I think the only reason I had choose to crap, it's because I can't find anything to talk about. I cant leave the conversation to die out. I feel stupid being stupid at times. Who is the real me? Am I really someone who is so lame and crappy? Seemingly forever happy-go-lucky? Introvert or extrovert?

But still, I had ignored people. I just don't feel like replying. Have this feeling "yeah, it's fine". No. I don't know why. OMG. I'm disagreeing with myself. Must be due to the hemispherically balanced fact. haiz. right now I'm crapping again. =]

Will people still like me if I had been quiet all the time? Would it be the same if I hadn't been crapping as much? Would it be the same if I had never watched and think about what I say and what I do? (There is people who say and do things without going through their mind.) How would it be different?

Somehow, guess I'm tired. Feel like tearing. But guess I'm not sad enough. Would you all go away?

blogg

Thursday. Tomorrow is Vesak Day. Do you know that I thought that was a Tamil festival? Haha. Anyway, Thursday is boring. 3 hours. 3 hours. Yeah I went today. But..I just sleep lar. So easy. Okie.. not really. But I think I have the capabilities of studying that myself lor. Though I won't lar. Just too lazy.

But it's really .. simple. hais. Sometimes I just think I'm too good for this and that and blah blah. Maybe it's wrong.. but. =] Whatever you say. SAY! SAY! SAY!

Wednesday Judo training. Grading FOOOH!!! All the formalities and stuffs. Then..
Sensei : Harai Goshi.
Joseph entered his leg, forgot about the hand for a beautiful kata (argh hacks), lifted and threw!
Zhaohan weighing 109kg, lifted like a feather, floated for 2secs and dropped.
BAMM!!!
WoohoO!!! Felt that great. =] Seriously it does. Yeah, I'm boasting. Wahahhaa. The rest was fine. I just love the feeling of throwing people. As well as being thrown bah. =]

Wednesday was a hell of training. Francis and Lin Feng worked hand in hand to screw us up. Yeah. I was fine earlier through all the exercises. Then I started to feel very thirsty. Very very. I drank. Still thirst. Drink and drink. Then my stomach started to feel bad. Watery and cold. grrr. My mouth still felt dry. The feeling... GRR!! I'm that weak!! -_-" hais. I can't feel my hand halfway through the training too. It's so weird. First time. Then. It's a numb pain. Numb + pain + can't feel anything else.

We went to eat at S11. Big gang. But seperated. Not enough tables. Damm. Doesn't feel as good as when we can all see each other. Hmm. COol. I still love the Judokas.

brain quiz

Brain Usage Profile

Left brain 50% && Right Brain 50%
Auditory 53.8% && Visual 46.2%

Joseph, you are one of those rare indiviuals who are perfectly "balanced" in both your hemispheric tendencies and your sensory learning preferences. However, there is both good news and bad news.

A problem with hemispheric balance is that you will tend to feel more conflict than someone who has a clearly established dominance. At times the conflict will be between what you feel and what you think but will also involve how you attack problems and how you perceive information. Details which will seem important to the right hemisphere will be discounted by the left and vice versa, which can present a hindrance to learning efficiently.

In the same vein, you may have a problem with organization. You might organize your time and/or space only to feel the need to reorganize five to ten weeks later.

On the positive side, you bring resources to problem-solving that others may not have. You can perceive the "big picture" and the essential details simultaneously and maintain the cognitive perspective required. You possess sufficient verbal skills to translate your intuition into a form which can be understood by others while still being able to access ideas and concepts which do not lend themselves to language.

Your balanced nature might lead you to second-guess yourself in artistic endeavours, losing some of the fluidity, spontaneity and creativity that otherwise would be yours.

With your balanced sensory styles, you process data alternately, at times visually and other times auditorially. This usage of separate memories may cause you to require more time to integrate information or re-access it. When presented with situations which force purely visual or purely auditory learning, increased anxiety is likely and your learning efficiency wll decrease.

Your greatest benefit is that you can succeed in multiple fields due to the great plasticity and flexibility you possess.

http://www.memoryedge.com/brain.html
Cool. =] True. Blog tomolo about today. Tired. Special note: Yaling's a cool girl.

Tues nite.

Tues. Missed a lesson. A test. How cool is that? Ate lunch with mom. How Cool is that? Then go to school. How Sad is that?

Nah, sit for medical imaging. CT scans. Fine. Scan me. C++ Programming. Fine. Too tough. But I managed to do something. Guess I'm in a good mood due to that? Nah. Not sure. Went home with Pris today. together with my classmates. On the way mah. Hahaz Then. Nothing. Tired. Good mood.

Maple. Dota. Sian.

Did I write this before? I wanna work again. Wait. I don't really want this. But. I think I want money. What for? Don't know. Spend it on food? Splurge? on girls? on birthday presents? on fashion? on impulse? I don't know.

Morning Tuea

Alright, Tuesday now. What happened to Monday. Well, I'm not sure. It was a short day in school. Lesson from 9 - 1. COol. =] But I decided to skip the 9am lesson then go for the 10. Extra 30mins of rest. =]

Reached there for the E learning. Signed my attendance. The kind lecturer asked me to sign for both the E learn as well as the 9am lecture. Well, guess he didnt know I wasn't there. haha. Started to solve the bloody thermofluid question. Easy. =] and then last week's . Easy too. Damm. Bored.

Nxt. LamLam class of Electronics. I heard a ICA is coming up. Haha. Should I start preparing now? Talked about transistor today. I slept. Woke up with some vandalising on my finger. ALICIA!!! Nevermind. It looks cool. =] Arigatou.

Then me, Ali and Vinvin proceeded for the nxt lesson. Tutorial with CheahCM. Not bad. Interesting. I actually wrote stuffs down on the tutorial paper. =] His lesson is always... hmm interesting I guess. hees.

Went to hand in the morning Elearn paper and proceeded home. Went CHeers. Met up with Wai and Tony on the train. Vinvin left at Admirlty. Tony left at Yishun. I left Wai at Woodlands. 900 home. Tired. SLept. Til 8? hmm plus or minus. Hees.

Dota. Maple. Time passed. I feel like working now. I wanna spend all this time. I wanna have money. I hate boredom.

=) ciaos.

I won't be blogging if I have a busy(interesting) life. So, if ever I were to stop blogging. Don't worry. It means I'm busy. But I will be back.

Sunday?

Sunday. 9pm. Felt like blogging after being bored for awhile. Woke up in the afternoon, switched on the comp. Went away for awhile. BJ asked for dota. -_-" okie. Drag and drag. Finally did. Whew. Not bad. Not as F-up as Sat's game.

Time passes. I'm bored. Stop dotaing. Chat. Bored with Chat. Slack. I think I ate lunch. Okie. Ate random stuffs. Bored. Bored. Bored. Maple. Dota. Maple. Chat. Don't feel like talking. No interests. No topic. Feels stupid to pull on conversation with craps. But it's effective. Talking about current affairs seems boring. I dont know much to chat about. Don't chat with me about the voting. Cause I don't read much too. I don't care who did what in which GRC, SCC,SRC, SRJC. -_-" okie.

Okie, read JY's blog. Ha, looks like the same thing of event is happening again. =] And then, she started to talk to me. Aww. So qiao. (learnt from someone lar.) yeah, stuffs happened until here. Rather boring.

Can I critizise her? Hmm, JY, read this and tell me. =] Hahaz.

So, right now. Nothing. Nothing at all. I don't have any feelings yet. Hmm. Desperado!!

Sun 144am

Alright. Had been busy too. thus the delay in blogging. Don't RAHH!. -_-" Friday went for Judo training again with cramps all over. Haha but I still did, and well rub abit of the heat thing and.. hmm not that crampy towards the end. =] But my breakfalls feel more painful. We were training our grading stuffs. and yea. Xinyi and Leo cant hold my weight thus can't reduce much of my impact. Dinner at Mac. End.

Btw, I wasn't sad that day. Just abit tired. I will smile if someone talks to me. =]

Played dota at night after Judo. Owned by zhaohan's friends using some fing tactics. Quited. Chat and chat. Played a few games of dota and saved a replay for Yaling.

Saturday. 6 hrs sleep. 11am. OMFG late for my friend's bday celebration. Judokas. =) Nvm. Reached there around 1230. Eating at Sakura Buffet. COol Place. Nice FOod. Not gonna elaborate. But I think we ate the price we paid for it. $24. A stack of 80 pudding cups. Went to Heeren. Walked around. Looked at pretty girls. =] Man. Then we went to Egaming place at Cineleisure Orchard. =] FUN!!! CS. But I sucked at it. yeah.

After tat, the gang split up. It got abit boring. Because we cant find anything to do. And.. yeah.. tired. =] Buffet nearly killed us all. Nevertheless, we all had fun. It rocks. I stayed with the gang that stayed after the thing. Wanna catch a movie. But there isn't enough seats. Not PS, not Cathay Cineleisure at Dhoby. Went to Gelare and had ice cream. Thank Dennis. It's really good. =] I left them after they decided to go pool, and met Leo as he's going home from bugis too. =]

Now, I'm at home. Playing dota. Tired. Sleepy.Happy. Just pissed with dota. And I played an hour of basketball today. =) hees. Seeya all.

Post 3 thurs

Personal Development Quiz - What kind of listener m I?

->People- Oriented Listener

Strengths:
-Cares and is concerned about others.
-Is non-judgemental.
-provides clear verbal and nonverbal feedback signals.
-identifies emotional states of others.
-Interested in building relationships.
-Notices moods in others quickly.

Weakness:
-becomes over-involved with feelings of others.
-avoid seeing faults in others.
-adopt emotional states of others.
-is intrusive to others.
-is overly expressive when giving feedback.
-is non-discriminating in building relationships.
----------------------------------------------------
Cool pretty accurate. Not a bad stuff from CMS. =]

Slack Thurs

How interesting. Previous post was completed at 530am. Yeah. Slept at 6.30am. Lesson at 9 am on Thurs. I don't wanna wake . I had the chance to..but. Hmm. Can't be bothered? (flame me) Today there's a 3hr tutorial and 3hr lab. =] as well as a test. = Yeah, forgot about it when I said I wanna slack. [edited] and Yeah, I skipped school today.

I missed out something last nite. The Lame Bros had a chitchat session last night. 3 guys. Talk for..erm 2.5 hrs? Yeah, guys can talk that long too. Civic Centre. Then move on to a playground. =] No details on the convo though. Hahha. Went home late. Shower late. Stil energized. Even after the training. We decided to train Leo DOTA and so we didn't get to sleep.

Sorta regretted that after I knew that I had a test, and what the shit. Man. Just forget it. Just hope for a retest or something. And yeah, had been absent twice for Thurs already. I haven't find something that will push me into becoming a hardworking student yet. And, this isn't good. I realised that and I know that some of my classmates will be "despising" me soon.

I started to get enthu about Judo because of the new stuffs. And new hope I had in me. =] Just make sure that this lasts. -_-" yeah. I'm a moody person. And so I give myself alot of excuses. Seriously, I think someone will come to think that "he thinks he knows himself , but doesn't do anything about it, what a moron?" Just Too Lazy. JTL mood.

Nah, my mind is pretty confused now. I wanted to write about more stuffs. Like how I think I want to get to my schoolwork due to having nothing that I really want to do. Is there anything that I had want to do? Is there anything that I had need to do? Need and Want. It's different.

Anyway, I just want attention, I think. =] Quite glad that alot of people is reading my blog. x)) smile guys. and tag with a nice nick with a "who you are".

Thurs 145

ROFL. School was lame. Sleepy. Boring. Hmm, nah, not exactly. Just abit more enthu about my Judo today. =] Skipping the School part.

Judo. Went early due to early dismissal. Met with Pris and Jiaying. =] Met JY earlier. Can say I dont feel much about her anymore. =] so cool. whahahah. Then we went to the dojo first. played abit and well, didnt realised I irritated her by that much. -_-" threw her once. And she went around whacking people. -_-"

Anyway, today's turn up rate was acceptable just that.. lateness. hahas Nvm, I'm not that punctual anyway. hahaha Cool, finally get a numbers of contacts. =] Yeah, I wanna get the freshies together bah. Some of the closer members stayed till the end with us. OMFG. We were so screwed by the physical training of Lin Feng Senpai. -_-" Diving pushup, crunches, cross jump. HolyCarp. Fish with halo. x)) Sets. Repeats. I can't feel my arms anymore. being such a long time since I do this. Secondary basketball training? How I miss my fitness.

Sorta spaced out after that. Overexerted myself? I don't know. Terrible feeling. Washed my face to remove some uncomfort. =] looks better after the wash I think. If not I would look so damm scary. -__-" Recover recover through the night. Ate at S11. Ramen Unagi was good. =)) hees. Talked. Played. Chatted.

Judo Club rocks. You guys rocks. =]

Tuesday

Cool day. Slept for only..er.. 3hours? Talked some crap with Jiaying. -_-" yea, shouldn't do it again. ROFL Anyway, I was so tired and uncomfortable that I managed to stay awake. Just cant make myself feel too comfy. =)

Went to school early for C++ programming. -_-" wanted to take a taxi, but it made me missed 3 buses?! wth. Then I went for the bus. -_-" whatever. saved the money for other stuffs. [FOOD!! =)) ] The MRT was not crowded at all. =] Good, but the way there was. Sian.

Managed to get myself to do some learning on C++. Rather easy. -_-" stop getting jealous of me, just take some time to understand the E lectures. Trial and Error works. Grr. Copy all you want. I'm lazy to do at times. =] LamLam Tutorial was okie. Learned something again. Nah. I wanted to slack. Oh well.

Studying of radioactivity and blablaba. OMG. Bored. Slept. -_-" think I snored. ROFL. Then went to eat Wanton Mee + extra wanton and Mee from Alicia. Crap. $2 for $5 worth? Nvm. Wanton was good. Mee too starchy. Hate the musky taste. Anyone the same as me? zzzz.

C++ again. Learned more again. =] Cool. ROFL. maybe I have a flair for such things lar. But please do understand that if I don't study, I can't make it either. So, do not treat me like a deity who can answer all your questions. I shall try my best.

Went home. Woah. Being awhile since we go back in a group. This may applies only to me though. -_- anti social. Got off at Admirlty to buy comics. Cool. Got 2. $10. zzz. Save abit tomolo. =)

Then I'm bored. Maybe playing game. But I think I shall sleep early. I wanna do my best for Judo tomolo. Not just tomolo. I wanna do something bah. =) hahas. Seeya all.

Tuesday now? 2.30am. Euphoric state's over. =) Starting to feel rather emotionless. Realised I'm like this most of the time I'm alone. Unless someone near me give me a tap on my shoulder or when someone close to me is around. Just been a few days. The confidence sorta worn out. Staying in front of a computer isn't very healthy. I guess. Feel like playing basketball when I'm free again. Planning. Procrastinating. -_-:: This is me again. =) Feel like dating Ann too, because she testimonied me. Procrastinating. =) hahas.

Thought about stuffs when I went out earlier to have dinner. Closed my eyes. Hmm. Cool. My brother and mother and aunt are annoyingly noisy. =)p ROCL. Roll On Car Laughing. x)) Okie, back to topic. I'm starting to feel that I haven't experience stuffs enough. Been rather aloof. From secondary school except for basketball. Only basketball matters. Even if I go to AMK, it will be a match. And ya, for some dates, then I had travelled. Minimal gatherings. Minimal outings with friends. Nil oversea outings w/ friends. Rather empty life?

Poly life had been an hassle as I had to take the train everyday. Somehow, I don't feel comfortable. Maybe due to the fact that I hadn't been in crowds much and I think I sorta hate crowdy areas. =_=" yea. And, I don't like eye contacts , with strangers. It feels weird. SHY!! =)) ROFL. Man, this isn't working out for me. What can I do...procrastinate.. , and I also don't like to go out for no good reason. " Hey, let's go Orchard for a cup of coffee. " "*SHOCKED!!* huh? I have 3 in 1 at home. =)) "

Yeah, -_-"crappish. Just somemore of me. =) Goodnight.

Joseph, your mood tends to swing between Uneasy & Sad.

Most of the time you feel uneasy. Your outlook on life tends to be negative and you spend considerable energy dwelling on your negative feelings and emotions. Your uneasy nature causes you to get worked up over every negative aspect of your life. When you feel sad, your outlook on life tends to be negative and you are plagued by feelings of dissatisfaction.

-_-" oh well. Another survey due to morning boredom.

Joseph, your sense of humor is Banter!

Like a king of pinball, you've made an art of playing off of people because your sense of humor is all about banter. Like many great comedians before you, a roundtable of friends, or a roomful of targets, is the catalyst for what makes you laugh. It brings out the wit — and sometimes the nitwit — in everyone. It's quantity, not quality that matters as you and your friends alternate outbursts like the riffs of a hit single.

Here's the bottom line: You're a social creature. Other people's inside jokes even strike you as funny. You manage to gravitate toward people who can appreciate a tall tale and you've probably never hesitated to fire off a zinger — even in a roomful of strangers. So keep it up with your bantering methods. Laughter, after all, keeps the world going 'round.

Ahh!! Cool. =)

Rants

Ranting ranting. Hmm, so bored. To be at home. Slept like 9 hours today. Did a questionaire. Lvled my maple rogue. =_= stil bored. My blog is under "rants". So I rant rant!! Rant. This blog is into the lurving theme. Who cares. It looks good. Green.

Reflecting my personality. Ha again. Find myself rather impatient. Yea, I can't wait for 3 hours, like queuing up.But I rather spend wasting time on something less important. Actually, this isn't about my personality. I meant to write about how I deal with my feelings, ya?

So, I know there is this group of people who read my blog. I had been keeping stuffs, although this is a journal for me to write my true feelings in. *there's always fake blogger personalities onlinne though*

My past relationships all went fast. On a quick pace as some would had say. Get to know Dawn on friendster. Met her a few times. The feelings escalated from friendship to BGR in like 2-3weeks. And, I think I were the one rushing it bah. Meeting her everyday, treating her like a gf even before anything is said. True enough, got together due to a unforeseen event. Then we did what normal couples do. Studying together, go home together, idling together.

All goes well, until I grad. I started working. Less time. More costly to go find her. Mm, my excuses. The pace is still running fast. Then it ended. End at the start of the 4th month. There were chances for us to get back together, but didn't, cause I didn't rush to patch. She tried everything and did everything. I apologised to her sometime ago though. Don't flame me.

Work and work. Some feelings for some girls on the way til the next r/s. Didn't get together, because I didn't rush or that girl managed to stop me from rushing. Refering generally. -_- Then, one fine day, saw Jasmine at SingaporeCricketClub. First impression not bad. Talked, played, felt good with her. Went back home together as she lived at Woodlands too. The pace. I think we skipped the friend and understanding eachother stage. We both thought we were ideal for each other at that point of time.

Sweet talks worked. We may had last forever if we never had stop to wonder what's wrong with the relationship. If she hadnt have to go to school and start a new beginning, a new stage. She got busy. Less time. Tiring for her. Excuses that I think for her, same as mine for Dawn. The feelings seem to fade. I held on to it. Broke up one fine Sunday. I believed that we could still get together. Sorta rushed at it again. Ended up hurting both parties. But, damm...it.. how do I slow down. Hais.

Maybe I should get used to it. The slowing down part. No more rushing I hope. The other guys could enlighten me abit. (but, I had more r/s than them though. *cheeky*) Doing so right now. *frustrated*

Learning something new.

Questionaire - 20 names.

1.Jiaying 2.Priscillia 3.Zhaohan
4.Koksiang 5.Jiawen 6.Leo
7.Brockjsee 8.Kaiyun 9.Xinyi
10.Wanshi 11.Naish -_- 12.Alicia
13.Vincent Tan 14.Natalia 15.Atirah
16.Wilson 17.Delphi 18.Tricia
19.Jeremy (My bro) 20.Zaty

Ok, abit messy, but to save space and scrolling time.

1.how did u meet 13?
BME course. =)

2.what would you do if u've never met 14?
Who knows. If I don't, I won't be writing her name down. Thus this question is invalid. =) -_-

3.what would u do if 11 and 16 dated?
Ha! I promote Racial Harmony and Gays.

4.did u ever like 20?
Nah, racist... er, Justkidding. Love her crappiness. =)

5.would 2 and 6 make a good couple?
ROFLROFL!!! Yea, should try. WahahHHaah

6. Describe 5.
Thick Specs, Gymmer, Jogger, Good friend. Humanoid?

7.Do u tink 4 is attractive?
Yea, very. *stand*

8.Tell me sth about 8.
Love comic idiot? something.

9.Do you know any of 9's family?
Is boyfriend included in the word family? Her dad gave me a ride once. Hm.

10.What's 12's favourite?
Freezing bees.

11.what would u do if 18 just confessed he/she likes you?
Panick.

12.what language does 16 speak?
Chi-na

13.Who is 1 going out with?
No one. Yea. *look away*

14.how old is 10 now?
I'm not sure. Stop growing at the age of 12? =X

15.When's the last time u talked to 19?
He just came into my room.

16.what is 3's favourite band/singer?
Himself. JayChou?

17.would u ever date 14?
Why not? She's a girl. I'm not gay.

18.would u ever date 7?
Why not? He's a guy. I'm not les.

19.Is 15 single?
Er,Yea I think.

20.What is 17's last name?
Er. Er. OMG. I don't know. I think the last name I call her by is Delphi.

21.Would u ever be in a serious relationship with 13?
How serious?

22.What school does 6 go to?
School of Engineering. Don't know the details.

23.Where does 3 live?
509. Woodlands. Beside Woodgrove Primary. 7th flr. I can get there with eyes closed.

24.What's yr fav thing about 20?
Crap. =)

25.Have u seen 12 naked?
OMG! *smiles slyly* *blush* *imagine* *that* *nose bleed* kidding. ROFL. NO.

After mid.

Aloha!

Wow, after midnight already. Hmm, Talked to her again. Good. Good. Hmm *Smiles* Haha, Yea, still euphorically happy. ROFL. And, yeah, other than being lame. I dont know how to entertain people. Nor cheer people up. Nor.. er intentionally joking a funny joke.

I'm just happy. I'm cheered up. I feel it. Haha. Please. If this is cruel, be like this forever. =) Did some quizzes. And, well.. I represent Lonliness(twice), Lost, Sound of rain, water, and ghost/spirit. Haaha, at least the results were quite uniform. So yeah. bleahs. Calm, powerful, destruction without realising.

Leo trying to get his WC3 running. We are waiting for him to get ready. On skype and chat. LoL. This is lame. but fun. haahs. Crap abit with her. haha. Heard her voice. =) Okie, sound so lame. I mean for me to say this. ROFL.

Aloha.

Nite.

Hmm, finally it's 8pm. Today sucks big time? Boring Boring day!!! Sit in front of computer. Maple maple and Maple. Then Dota Dota and Dota. Pretty sick of this already. hahas, dont have this thought while I was playing it though. -_-".

What else did I do today?. Watching cartoons. Ate. Ate. Nothing else. Haiz. What a boring life. remembered I used to play bball from afternoon til evening in school, then went outside to play till the court is closed. So cool. So much fun.

*crash*

What the.. My chair just crashed on me. Scared the hell of out of me. Now I'm only heaven. =) Haha, and yea, I can blog over a period of 10mins to 3hrs. Just bcause there's much happening right now. -_-

I wonder how things will develop again. Ciaos.

Woke up

Oh man. Finally. 8hrs of sleep. Slept at 4.30 Woke up at 12.30. But, I think I slept too longer, feeling even sleepy right now.

Had a long talk with Pris last night. Thus the sleeping at 4.30 but it was worthed it. We talked about feelings. Well, She likes me now as, erm, something else bah. Good to know that, and we are still friends. Don't think of all the "what if"s, it represents regrets. And well, when something happened, it must be for a reason bah. =)

I shall not go into the details of the convo. =) hees I'm giving myself one more week bah. More time. Shall not rush. Shall not be impatient. Shall not do the same mistake. =) hahas

Linsay Lohan - over.

Confidence again?

Hahas, feeling euphoric right now at the moment. Judo training was abit boring. But talking with hia di-s rocks. hahas. This is what good friends are for, ya? ROFL. I guess it wasn't love that make me happy, it was the confidence that came along that did. =)

I will back pace my day later. Feel like chatting with her right now. Too bad she went offline, ya? Wanna talk to her about some private stuffs, but I wonder if she's ready not. Jiaying, I still feels that you wanna stay away from me. Somehow. Maybe I just think too much. Hahas. Nevertheless, I think you still read my blog just as I do to yours. So... =)

Rather weird day. Slept at 2am last night. Woke up at 645? Cool! =) Idled abit before doing my stuffs. Selfish Dad dont wanna give me a ride to school. =( Wasted abit of time at home before I left my house. Late Late!! Who cares? Met Amalina on the way at Woods MRT. How nice. =) Talked abit, but after awhile, nth to talk liao, so I kept quiet and she listened to MP3. Aww. All the way till class. Walked in like some big shot. woo hoo! I am. x))

Transferred myself from Jap 2 to Personal Development. How cool is that. I can slack for 1 module le. =) COol, so I had 4 hours break today. Torturing. Brutal. BME HUB LOCKED. BULLS!! Ate slowly. Vinvin dear went for his Jap2, how sad. (yeah..going act cute gay style.) Anthony ate with me and Alicia. yeah and now people think she's my girl. wtv. Talktalk.FinBreakfast. Went to look for leonard for the transfer thing. Waited for an hour bah? sit around talking , while Alic make her Mermaid Band. -.-

Some guy came to look for her. Interested in her. Bigger size. HipHopDressing. Turning Alic off. I joked about "Oh no, dont look at me.. nth between me and her. Take her. take her." Alic laughed her head off. OMG. BEHEADED WITH LAUGHTER. x)) Leo called me so I left her with her hunk and went ahead to the dojo. Slept that for an hour? I think. Then Xinyi called me. To help Delphi to do her survey. Oh yea, I helped her with 3 in the canteen earlier already. Nvtless I didnt reject to help, so I took 8 pieces. -_- oh well. Got her number because of that. =) hahas. Flirt.

Went back with leo to SEG as he's having lesson, mine's at an hour later. Sit around. Vinvin dear smsed me and we met outside class, and so did Alic. =) Hahas. Slept like 50% for the next 3hrs of lectures. Cool =). Went for Judo straightafter. Delphi came to dojo to get the forms. She's pretty. hahas. okie. I sat around and look at wanshi lead the 1 new member as well as pris. Command of English is bad. I had a hard time trying not to laugh at it. Wtv.

new member = ZhiLing. Quite cute, small size. Impatient. Very enthu. Very..er.. hmm , should get to know her more. Just know she's quite impatient that's all. She wanna learn and learn. btw, she's a yellow belt. just tt she forgot all about it and is relearning. oh well. No prob for breakfalls. I think the rest managed to teach her throws.

Went for dinner after that. Silat training and rehearsals + stunts were cool man. Then we mimic-ed and did alot of lame stuffs. GAYS ROCK!! Plenty of fun. but I still think of Jiaying. =) Cockles for dinner again? WTH? Judokas are addicted to it somehow. God bless them. The cockles I mean. I ate alot too lar. This time only. Pretty good at this too. x)) Then, we went home. btw, scott brought a gal to dinner. LoL. NICE ONE SCOTT!! YOU HAVE OUR SUPPORTS. hahas.

Then went back to Woods. Chatted with Zhaohan and Leo. Cool. Age doesnt seems to matter. Talked about crap. We swore to the Road Deity. We are sworn brothers now. If we dont honour this swear, we will each lose a "car" by having a car runing over it. =) ROXORS LAME!

Ciaos. Confidence Rocks. I'm vain too. =) Horoscope = Leo.

thurs nite

Haha, guess I had been too free today. Took a whole day of rest. Only to find nothing to do at home. Terrible feeling. Start to miss her again at night. haha. Nvm. This will go. Judo training drained too much yesterday. =) I wanna go for Judo on Friday again. Being busy, would be just fine. =)

Being too free sorta set me on fucked up mood. I wanna snap. I wanna.. and I wanna... and.. blahs. Secrets again. =)

Why do I feel like I cant find something to talk about. With... anyone at all. Except for zhaohan, takki for dota.. starting to feel drained emotionally when I strain myself to find a topic. No. I don't know. Feel like isolating once again. No.

Don't dare to express anything. Don't dare to do anything. Don't dare to ask anything. Don't want to change anything. I'm not brave enough, to confront with the consequences. Failures make me fear. I think I'm worn out, again.

I joked to cover up. I lied to hide. I can't run because I don't know where to go. I...

hahaz =) aloha.

Morning

Ha! Forcibly woke up at 730, then I fell asleep again. Thank God for this sensation. Hahaz. -_- Woke up again at 930. OMFP! hey, lessson at 9..er... and I'm still on bed..done nothing. Okie.. Im missing this 3hrs lectures. Cooooool!! and Hey, we are talking. Cooool!! -jellyfish-

Went to take a shower. And oh yeah. I forgot what I wanna blog again. HS. Just feel liking blogging la. =) Anyone wanna take care of me? I'm a 80kg toddler who has nothing much to do and wont grow tall anymre at max height of 178. Nah! No. Zaty. I know you will volunteer. No..I'm racist. Hahaz okie.. This is just a joke. >_<

Just so bored with current affairs. (wooaah!) Think I shouldnt be bothered about foreign affairs. ( =P running a government. ) And, yeah.. Whatever. Err.. See you guys on KCDC. Bye Bye!! -_-

Judo

Wow, Judo orientation was fun. -.- See.. this could save alot of time by using just one line. =/ hahas. Btw, yeah was there earlier. Read the previous post. Bored. Nothing to do. Hahas. Saw her running away again.

Can't believe that those freshies were so blur not to come in to the dojo to check. Guess they are afraid to. hahas. Poor juniors. Shy. The turn-up rate was rather sad. Dont think there is even 50 people. Guess they went for the other clubs and then stay there already. =] God bless them for missing out such a good club. LoL!! There's more guys than gals though. Contradicting with the fact that there was more XX that signed up for the club.

Begin with normal warmups. Tumbling. (down the stairs. ROXOR. no) Sensei came in. Paused. Continue. Then we do some breakfalls warmup. Cart wheel. Blablah. (Join the NYP Judo Club for mre information. =) hey, this gotta work with the sign up rate. =)) Tiring. Francis came. bad premonition.

Wasn't exactly tired. I think I just need more sleep. hahas. Training my full without distraction, increases my endurance. Water breaks sap you of energy. Trust me. The freshies got to join in. How fun. hahas. Being thrown. Wahahaha. This is weird. I believe all of the above weren't interesting. Let's talk about the freshies.

They came in, rather confused. Lost misguided souls. yea, they need someone to guide them from the sports hall entrance. =) and yea, they havent break their ice. Let me break them up into pieces while we get to that shall we? Met a kendo pal which I made during the orientation. Nice. He seems to be joining liao. thanks to me. =) I'm cool. x))

We could see some couples. But I'm sure none of them will join. I saw a few during last year's orien(shortform frm now on). This is a lonely club. Awww. LoL Just kidding. The exact reason could be that they dont interact with others when they are with their mates. yea? agree? Then they will think that "hey! this isn't fun?, let's do something that will be fun for both of us"..yeah sure, go home and mate.

There are sweet and cute looking girls. Wonder if they will ALL join. Emphasizing on all. hahas. Despo. Woohoo! -_- One really catches my attention. Including pris of course. She nearly fainted. -_-.. You need to get used to it. I get giddy alot of times too.

I think I wanna cont.. but.. Judokas requested dota. Seeya again.

-Those who protect themselves, knows not how to protect others.-

crush

=) Blogging in school nothing. There isn't anything much for me to do now except for waiting for judo orientation to start. =_= hais. Wonder if she will be coming. Went to read her blog again. hahaz, actually, had been wanting to see what she writes so that I can know what she feels. sorta closing off from me recently. hahaz.

Anything goes. I'm someone who thinks crushes can last. Crushes can develop into something more. But.. hmm, girls. oh man. -_- Gotta admit Im quite a flirt lar. Do develop feelings easily. And so does get hurt easily too. Is this immaturity? hmm, have to ask my friends once in a while to decide for me. Maybe they are just too kind to say Im so immature bah.

Bottomline is, I dont know if I will be liking another girl soon. My feelings. Oh well. Screw it. Whatever. When you are finally fine with being my friend, come back to me again. Then, I will know. No point hypothesizing now.

And.. Anyone, if you find me hateful, let me know. I hate myself at times. And well because I know myself more than anyone else. Changing is always good, but it isn't easy.

And, Oh yea. I don't understand why do you have to avoid me when..yea, after you answered me. *Wonder if I'm having problem expressing this point..alright.. I will stop. *

Remember.

One wrong move. and its a checkmate. Nothing helps anymore. But still, I hope we can have another round. Nevertheless, there will be others. The odds of meeting the same is so diminished. That's what hope is about. =)

Today, rather funny. Lots of stuffs happened. hahas. I'm keeping myself positive. Nah, don't wanna return to that state again. hmm.. private stuffs. Lots of it. Controlling my emotions, so I won't get hurt.

And, starting to have the tots of experiencing pain. =_= like.. breaking a arm or something. Dont go Ewww.. or.. Oh no..Joseph going sadist. Nah. It's just that..well, curiosity. You cant say you can endure pain unless you really experienced it before, ya? =) hees.

Blog again. Tomorrow. Judo Orientation.

late.

Haha. Slept late last night. Woke up late. Not exactly late. Damm. Look at timetable. Grrr. Stupid LamLam lesson. LoL.. Dont go liao. weee. rest til 1pm. hahas.

Emotions running wild. I controlled too much before. I can't feel like I want to now. Wonder why I can force myself to laugh, or just try to force some tears out. Digging into past sorrows. haha.

When I say hurt me to make me forget. I don't mean it. I was just trying to say, please dont allow me to forget, you are too important to me.

I was just trying to be harsh. but not to harm. Now I realised, I wouldnt do this anymore. Hope it won't be too late.

feelings

All began from the club crawl. The feelings. Mutual. All so fast. Far too similar to that again.

Would had been fine. when I chose to follow my feeling. Another guy appeared. Confused. Panicked. Did stupid stuffs.

Selfish. Hurt both. Regret now. Why did I repeat the same mistake over again. It shouldnt had gone this way.

The feelings. Mutual, still there..right?

11

Lesson at 9am well then.. I left house at 9 something. ROFL. Usual me. Late. Nvm. Went for Elearning. WTH!? 1 hr just to solve one simple physic-like question. rofl. think too much till cant solve it wor? all the thousands of answers out there. =_= Then there is the lame electronics thing again. repeat the same stuff as last week. crap. Then biomaterials, well, still okie..at least ended early.
No lesson from 12.45 onwards. ... went to look for JY. lol. Saw her and her sis. And I think she felt awkward. =_= stayed with her for awhile til she left for lesson. haha. Then, I went to slack at the library. oh yea. went back to eat first. My friends shoo-ed out of the biomed hub. wahaha pesky first year. having lesson there. LoL Wait and wait. Read a storybook. Cant finish it. About some Othman. Politician. =_=
Hp died. Went to cca clubroom area. See kendo ppl. See Leo, Anthony, Janice. Jaw dropped. LoL hahaz. asked leo to go kendo with me. Haha. JY was nearly late. anyway, their training has some similarities with Judo. but they are more organised. Fierce sensei. Expensive club fee. lol. Ithink. =X Disciplined. Nevertheless, Judo rocks. =)
I dont wanna go into the details. But now I know the footwork. as well as how to draw a shinai. And some stuffs lar. My jap sucks still. grrr. Sent JY home after that. Seems weird still. Whatever. haha. Ciaos.

Green blog

Hm , did a change of skin. When did I get so hardworking...yeah.. someone pushed me to. =] hahaz yeah, that JY again. diao. x)) And, well.. maybe I should blog more lar. Was so fascinated by someone's big big blog achives.

haha, what should I write about? This is weird. haha. No longer feel depressed anymore. Maybe its due to the school's opening. Maybe something else. Seriously, I not that frank nor straightforward. haha,so... somethings are still best kept to myself.

Had been talking alot on msn with JY, pris and the nonsensical Zaty who never get bored of me. x)) haha.. and no, I'm not flirting lar. Of course, if you guys talk to me, I will glady chat...but I think you all will feel gayish bah? wahahhaz

Playing maplestory. <--- yeah flame me. hey, because it can waste alot of my idle time and I won't have to put up with stupid allies on dota on euro Bnet. (for more infomation, www.eurobattle.net) haha being sleeping late still. Talking. Talking. Minesweeping. Grr!! haha I wonder if she will ever get bored with playing with me. *worried* rooooll..

haha, I'm omitting private stuffs. bleh. maybe I will be more open next time. Introvert mah. continuing read my blog, and remember to tag. but..yea, dont be like HER!!! *vomit blood*

I will blog more from now on. Quite fun. And yea, being happy. Aloha!!

Saturday`

Waaaahaaaaa... Good afternoon. x)) I woke up at 9.15.. *OMFG LATE!!!!* *take briefs throw in toilet and get towel* *hmm..zz..hmm... today..Saturday...* OH YEAH!! NO SCHOOL!..zzz.. cant sleep back after this. Went to check my torrents. Ooooh...GS destiny completing soon. x)

*cut**

Okie, I think I tried to write what happened in the morning. But, its messy and I can't really understand what I trying to write. *having this problem of expressing myself lately* I had been tiring myself out this week. Not intentionally. Sleeping late, and early lessons. Club Crawl.

My back is getting tired easily, my rib hurts abit. Too much breakfall. Nevertheless, Saturday sleep sorta revitalised me, as well as slowing down my pace. =) Went on for breakfast, 2 packs of chongpang nasi lemak + 1 otah. watch tv. watch GS destiny. play game. stone. roll on bed. slack. repeat. hmm this life rocks.. >.< hahaz go ahead and disagree with everything you got. =P

Crazy Jiaying.. yeah, she loves me. x)) hahaz must be love at first sight right? lol~ she's still uber hyperactive and abit fong lar. weeee, and she likes playing minesweeper. not with me though. gonna hate her for making me lose so many times. I used to hav records like 40+ W 3 L only. =( and stupid msn reseted it. *confused eh?*

*Was I been very obvious during the club crawl... how did she notice that? lol.. something.. yeah. I just cant seems to get myself to know what is it. haahz, you are the only one who told me that leh. The rest didnt notice as much. * this part is for Jiaying. LoL. Just for you leh. =) wahahaha

Actually, I just dont know what to write about. My mind is tingling with thoughts. And I feel that my english is getting from bad to worse. and most importantly, I cant express myself. And its getting messy.

aiadjakf ahakjbd aobjnw inkr nkdpaib fio albs ksfs knksneos t... Messy bah. grrr. brb. once I know what to write.

Wednesday-Thurs

Tired. Due to club crawl. As well as some personal matters,LoL.. Hahaz..Pris had been so close to me recently and people are thinking that we are steads or something. Going to school together, going back together. Haha, I see why we are mistaken to be.

But, we are not. We didn't reach that stage. Just very good friends yeah? haha If you aren't happy, let me know. I will accompany YOU to school too. But as I'm a lazy person, if you are too far, dont expect me to go, and please do know that I have a very high tendency to be late. your choice. x)) haha..

Club crawl had been messy. Too many stuffs, communication breakdown. Floods. Dao people. We managed to get 140+ people to sign up. Other clubs get numbers like 200+. Oh well. and, the people who signed up, 90% are gals? or so I heard. WOW. NYP Judo Girls Club. Kudos to all the desperate guys in Judo 2006. (hmm, am I? ) Next year, the girls would get alot of guys. Vicious cycle.

Managed to get to know some people from other club through the club crawl. The rarely seen Akikdo people as well as Kendo. I would know more if I socialize abit more. But..yeah, Im an introvert. Managed to click with a kendo girl well. Jiaying. lol, maybe because she was hyper-active (Sort of) and very friendly lar. and uber playful. =/ Like our Judokas. lol. Another friend ha.

I was very active on the first day. Thrown on the sports hall floor. Did alot of stuffs actively. Including defeating BJ again. wahaha. Im the worthy Gold medalist. Even though I only slept for 3.5 hrs that day. Slept after that at the club and then rehearsed again at night. 2nd day, I slept more. But..I felt so slack. I reached early. no one. Jeremy first.then Jiaying. then the rest came promptly.

Early performance. Late polar. Screwed up schedule from the Student Union. Messy performance due to some adrupt changes. Then, they removed the mats. Cant do anything without mats unless we want PAIN. and I was hurting due to day 1 already. sad. Slack. Ate. Slept. lol.

Man..ended.. how sad. back to normal school. =)

JudoJudoJudo=

Woah..2 blog in a day. Rare stuff again. Just to show how bored I am. =/ Judo from the afternoon til night. Not bad, it really can takes up my time but still, I think I wanna rent a unit near NYP so I can go school easier. but...think I would need a job too. And..would they agree. (job yes..but renting) =/

Damp lazy for transport and transport time.. might as well save the $45 a month on concession for rent. =/and..so I had been taking taxis all this time to school and back too. COol!? x))

Let's talk about today's activities. Well, sensei sure had his way with the club crawl performance, some great and crazy and fresh ideas. CheerS for sensei!!~ lol~ but still since its new, its tough too. As well as painful. *ouch* flip breakfall. rolling break continously. fun scenerio for self-defense.

My heart and mind is still running about. Unable to settle down on something. Unable to decide. =) hees. Whatever, the usual sloppy me.

Jasmine

I'm as bored as usual.

I went to read her blog once more. I wonder why had I feared of reading her blog in the first place. Her life is still the usuals too, full of fun and excitement. x) Good to see that. Had to admitted that Im jealous.(the fun and excitement part) I think she's the first girl I was so emotionally attached to. Maybe because during that time, my life was having a void and my heart has nowhere to go. Went well but didnt last long.

OMG!! It was all in my mind awhile ago..I forgot what to write now. I didn't continue to be her friend, sorta avoided her or stuff. =/ kinda bad, AND this is something that I rarely do. del her msn contact, stop viewing her blog. hmm =/ but I didn't block her. Think I was wishing that she will talk to me on her own. AND now I still don't dare to re-add her on msn. =/ wth..wimp.

Maybe right now, my life is still in the void. or went back to. x)) No aims. Nothing. Momentarily laughters. Games seems to be my only place. =) Void. Maybe I would start isolating myself, and then reset. easier said then done.

Jasmine LCM. xP I'm no longer angry or anything. but I wonder if you will see this. Sorry. *smile*

Happiness

Hey, seriously, I can't find anything to write about. =/

Last post, I sounded angry, sad, negative, disappointed. Or so they say. x)) hahaz realistic comments yeaH?

Happiness..how do I start this of? the feeling of being happy? It's quite random. Refering to its appearances in a person's life, or day. How many times do you smile in a day, or laugh, or giggle, or happy thoughts, or felt sweet, being praised, admired, treated to a drink, or etc. =/ You were happy, aren't you? Then when you stopped for a moment, when you are alone, when you stop thinking and look out for cars..how exactly do you describle that feeling at that moment.

Seeriously, I felt like I'm in that state now. <- double e is a mistake. I wanted to conclude that I'm sad, but i'm not. Lonely, maybe. Aimless, yeah. Bored, =/. BRAH! hate this empty feeling. So empty. Can someone just come into my life? or just kill me? or shall I kill myself? from malnutrition aka obesity. x))

Anyway, I blogged becus I'm rather bored. And I think I didnt stay in point with the title. But who cares? Life's without constraints. Good luck peeps~ AND don't worry about me. IF you do. AND if you do, DON'T worry about me. x))

Responsibility

hmm, recently I had been acting weirdly. or is it so?

The Judokas must be scolding me for being a irresponsible farktard who never shows up on time or never at all. Alright, yea, I'm in charge of the sandwich board. During the meeting, I was enthusiasfabjkda(enthu, I cant spell) about the whole thing for club crawl. All and all. Clearing of clubroom etc.

Missed Friday, Sat,Sun(was there?) meeting, very late for Mon meeting, didnt bothered about tuesday, was late on Wed but didn't go in the end, Thurs today too. Tomorrow is Friday again. They tried very hard to get me there, and it does make me feel bad at times. But the feeling just isn't right. I know I'm being irresponsible and stuffs. And I also know this kind of attitude is bad. So, seriously, I don't need to be lectured.

Commitment. I can't feel commited. Anything at all, except for food, water and air. Everything I do now is due to the spur of the moment. Sure, I can build you a vehicle..if I have the mood. This explaination doesn't help in removing me from the status "Irresponsible". But you have to realise that this word doesn't apply to me everywhere.

I bought breakfast for my mom this morning. ( eg. =P ) Responsible? I didn't clean up my room. (hmm.) I helped my friend to move her bed. (hmm.) I switch off the lights when I dont need it. (hmm.!! for a blue and pure world.) so...whatever. I seldomly get refers to as irresponsible in school too.

Thinking :
Irresponsible is a word, used by "people", that refers to not doing something "people" wanted you to do for the greater good of "people".
"Good to see you being so commited" would be a compliment.

=) Cya all irresponsible busdirt.

Dont Know.

Lazy to blog. Lazy to chat. Lazy to reply smses. LoL! L for Lazy.

Tues, went for a movie V for Vendetta with the Judokas guys. 8 guys! HA! It's fun. Joking around in a big group, but we cant find anything to do. Walked from PS to Somerset. Walked around in department stores. Looked at VCDs, food, and toys. wth. But it's fun. Funner than staying at home and staring at the computer.

Seriously, this few days, the outings spent alot of my money. I mean my allowance. Hence my mom is nagging. AND SERIOUSLY, all of this have to do with Judo. Birthday, AGM, clearing of clubroom, movie with judokas, doing something for the club crawl. wow. oh, there's also Judo training.

Wed, after Judo, I decided to go to polar's house to watch Initial D fourth stage which he had lost the disc on Sunday but Sensei Francis retrieved it and brought it during the training. Leo and Ks came along, and we watched the discs til morning. All 14 esps. =) kinda boring though. Polar cooked fr us!!

Slept for 7-8 hrs in the morning? my day just started. 6pm cya.

Monday Morning!

How refreshed. Been awhile since I blogged. Lazy to blog as well as nothing for me to blog. Same life everyday. Same nocturnal gaming spree.Until recently.

Slept abit earlier, waking up abit earlier. Somehow, I feel this way makes me feel better. (Though waking up in the afternoon is abit boring as its so hot and I wont wanna go out.) Judo Judo Judo this weeks for the Competition on Sunday. Yeah, yesterday. Sunday.

Inter-Tertiary Judo Championship 2006.
We are supposed to meet at 730 at CityHall o.O , while I woke up at 6 something. and yeah, meeting up with pals at 630. =_= I remembered that I was so excited that I can't sleep..well. Sleepy, teary eyes. Most of them was late for the 630 one.(my pals =D) so, I managed to beg my dad to give me a ride. 5 of us in a Proton car. waha?!

We managed to reach Cityhall in time and meet the rest, then we moved on to SMU. We were even earlier than the coordinators. >_< (Received NYP judo jackets!![made by us, not SMU] ww00t cool~) The games were nice. Just get better with each match. COol throws, great holds. Hmm..well, there are always some bad ones though.

Anyway, I won a gold medal for my catergory. not to be very proud of.

NYP wons alot of medals that day, maybe becus we had many participants. But stil, winning is another thing. =) Celebrated at Zheng Fa. x)) not exactly a celebration. just to fill our stomach. hahax. Played CS after eating with the Judokas. Well, it's fun playing with so many friends. haha. The joy and laughters.

Tired. Happy. =)

Tues

Well well.. yesterday was a fine day. Woke up late. and..was late for Judo. =) no one scolded or anything. ha! =P

Judo training was..well..interesting. hees. didnt really get me all tired. but it does hurt abit. Woke up around 3 something. Felt a sharp pain around my knee when woke up. Must be one of the bad throws someone or two did on me. Blame it on my bad breakfalling. x)) (and I had to miss today's extra training. =/ )

Judo competition coming in the next 2 week. Well, my performance is average, my stamina is unknown. I'm not sure... haha *pause* thinking of the promises she made for me. for the competition. haha sure planned alot that time. just a sudden thought *resume* I wonder how I will fare for it. Any medals? Let's not be over-confident. hees =) but it will suits me better to be that way?

okie..what's that word now.. Sianzationalised. got it. Going Judo does help abit. If only my knee is alright now..

Mondayblues..

Monday..rite.. 2am. Dont feel like doing anything. But it's so boring. Games get boring after some times. What is it that I should be doing to stop feeling bored?

Going out with friends would be a way, but what if all the friends and including you are lazy to. Hmm. Weird. Turning nocturnal already. Sleeping through noon. Waking up at night. Playing games til morning. Yeah. I know some of you will be saying its a boring life. Yeah. I'm starting to feel it already.

Judo training starts again. maybe it will solves this problem, or maybe just lessen it. Come to think of it. Basketball cca for 4 years in sec school. It was never boring for me. But now, basketball..it just feels like..its not the same. Not that much basketball friends to play with. Not that much competition. Not much of training. It felt so different now. But I know when I'm playing it, I am happy in a way. Naturally.

So..is everything else the same for me? I don't know. Dammit. Feeling empty again.

Monday

Ok..Due to popular demands. I'm back.

4 people. =) Good to have this kind of popularity without a need for scandal spamming or mass flaming of people. x))

Anyway, life's the same for me. On the track now. I mean..look. My track happens to belong to a 80s locomotive. It's slow. And waste alot of power. AND will produce alot of noise if you want it to accomplish something like moving from one place to another. x)

Gaming takes up like 70% of my life now. Not professional gaming. Just some weird group of non-sociable guys getting together online to play some no-brainer games to get the satisfaction from defeating and flaming some other non-sociable gays online. Pretty interesting..you will never know..

Great. What should I write now. Maybe I will just end here before I start on my failures for the recent exams.Well. Failures does not mean that I failed, just not getting satisfactory results. =) smiles.

ByeZ.

Monday

How long had it been already..since I blogged.

Haha.. Exam week, study week. Heck care. No mood to study!! wee~ games games games til morning then sleep. x)) Cool. Went out a few times. Well, not that fun. Maybe we chose the wrong activities to do already. LoL!

Sat was Joanna's gathering. Hmm before that I went to play lan with takki and polar. Not bad. Time passed quick. Then after some persuasion, I got them to come with me to Jo's gathering. Whew. Nearly entered Sentosa for no reason. Jo and gangs(plural becus there were really.) were eating at Harbourfront centre.

After that, went to Dhoby Ghaut. -_- planned to go karaoke at a special room which can hold 30+ people. 1500. WHAT!? mesos? NO! S$. what the... went down to Cineleisure Orchard. kk. The gangs split up. Pool. and Kbox. Great.7 ppl 1 pool table. After an hour, our group left. Went to eat macs. The ladies left. A giant came. Great!! Went down to Pardigram for more pool?.. This time..2 table. COol. But was really tired. My EYES BURNED UNDER FLUROSCENT LIGHT?!? wonderful. NR2 and we reach woods. Slept at 8 cuz I gamed. =P hees

Sunday!! Marina Bay!~!~ Woke up at 4? wahaha. Just nice. I was late. so were the guys who went with me. Leo and Polar. =P Zhen Fa!! COok Cook! Lotsa BaconS Lotsa OIL!!! We were deep frying stuffs there. This is new. Ha! Poor prawns. Tortured by Us!!! Oh yeah. This gathering consisted of 5 Judo Guys. No naming.. Arcaded after that. Boring shit! Hate arcades now. (Becus I wasted money and I cant win.) (addon: games are supposed to make you happy..not angry and frustated at the end of the day.)

Went Home. GAMED again!! til morning!!! hees. Then slept til 3pm. W00t. Great. I'm so bored now. Seriously, I need to find more stuffs to entertain myself...but not expensively. Screw YOU POOL!! AND YOU TOO ARCADE!! Maybe my body missed the sweats... Basketball. x)

815pm Monday.

Valentines'

Woot..Tuesday le..

Ha..The test on Friday.. well.. It's fine. Abit slow. Nevertheless, I think it will be an A.

Stayed over at aunt's on Saturday. Played til 5am. Slept til 5pm Sun. Went home. Weekends over.

Monday, missed school due to nuan-ness.

Interesting...Ha? Cant sleep well man. Just lotsa games to distract myself from sleep.

Hees. EPC practical today was crap..=) That's all? The girls brought chocolates for everyone. Sweet. Merci, Hersheys.. x)) Thanks Atirah, Natalia, Diana. Ha!

Happy Valentine's for everyone!..

Wed 0247. Nitez.

Thurs-

ha..Dont think anyone would read my blog..since it had been inactive for so long.

Went to view her blog once more. Maybe I shouldn't have.

Haiz..Need time isn't it. Guess I'm not so tough myself.

Biomodeling test tomorrow. With my capability, it should be an easy task, just hope that my mood won't affect my judgement. =) Os result coming out tomorrow too. Why am stil I bothered about it. stupid xinyi.

I'm tired..but don't feel like sleeping yet. 2am now? ha..go take a shower..

Hey..tag if you read! =)

NewS!

Jasmine Lin Ching Mei and Joseph Ng Jun Wei broke up on the 22th Jan.

Ha..think I have to let everyone know.

I always had that little hope of patching up with her, but now it's already gone. Mistake made maybe I shouldn't had allowed the break in the first place. Another might be I'm not good enough for her.

x) Oh well, that's all. I'm so crap. Impatience. Not ready.

Time to go on with my life..but I will never forget her.

Thanks for the final blow.

Tues..Today

Ha..Busy school today..Went well..just tired..

I think I still like her alot. I do like her alot. Don't ask me to stop wasting my time. Instead I need encouragement. Maybe you think I made the wrong choice. But.. right now.. I can't give up.

What should I do. I'm tired. No. I still can go on. til I lose the strength.

Tues

Hmm, Monday again. So tired.

Some stuffs happened. Well, dont intend to tell it to the masses. So I wont blog it.

Haven't give up yet. Gotta do something about it bah.

Today's lesson = 1hr of Comm skill giving tips for the common test. WoW!
Managed to connect to wireless in school now. Blogging as well as doing some work here.
Anyway, I'm bored. Maybe I will go back to Woods and walk around. ThinK of something bah.

That's all.

Friday

How I wish I have more time..An hour seems so short, morning is short, noon is short, night is short, a day is short, a week is short, a month is short, a year is..well..

Everything seems short to me now. Too busy. And when I have time to think about what I had done. Nothing much. Really. Maybe it's this small bits and pieces of things I manage to do with this short time mass up to something really wonderful at the end of the year. Or maybe when its too late for me to change it. No time limit. You never know when will be enough. I'm not refering to anything in particular but something that is so general that I have no clues about it.

Is it because even if you set a goal, you might change it when you never really hit it. Making it simpler or even difficult, you just never hit it. Change so frequently that, you were never be satisfied.

-paused- think-

Please ignore the above paragraphs. I'm crapping.

NYP opened the house today as well as yesterday. Ha! Took part in it. For my cca. JudO! Woah! Fun! Skipping lesson legally. Look at babes. Look out for shuai guys(potential gay partners) Nah. Wasn't really what I was doing. Just enjoyed the times I spent with the Judokas. Nothing special. In a small dojo. Throwing around. Rehearsing. That alone made my day. Friends. Ha!

Lamerage to the excess, as well as some jokers when we were rehearsing. The Judo performance was nice. Zhonghua Wushu was spectacular. TKD was abit..well...okay..but they do have nice backgrd music. Oh yeah! before that, I went for lesson. Ha! Surprisingly when I can be excused. Did biomodeling. NEW STUFFS! Thank god I went. and I got FULL MARKS FOR THE EXAM TOO!!! ROFLOLMAO!~

After all that, stayed around with a Judo gal and wait for her bf. Well..seems stupid..but she was using my laptop. shun bian had my dinner too.

Now I'm home. Tired out. Tml's PT. Should I sleep? or should I wait for...reply..

End.

Missing..

Wednesday 18th

Yo! Busy busy. Seems to myself that i had gotten back on track now. Not that slack. But am really tired. Is it tiring to be myself? or am I trying to be someone different. =X Anyway, I did say that I will change yeah? ( or did I?..hmm.. )

I went for Judo today again. 2 times in a week! weee! How long has it been? Although I go for lessons now, slack lesser, I stil play games. hahaz Cant stop playing. Oh! rmb I still haven't hand in my organic chem. oh well. heck care (o.0 slacker alert! ) =P

Okie, shall go back to playing game.

Seeya. ya?

Tired.

Monday

Okie..School reopened today. Missed the first lectures (2hrs) but went for the other one.

Kinda pissed my parents off for not going for the first one.

Judo after lesson(2 hrs after). It was a rehearsal for the open house on Thurs, Fri and Satur. It's fun being throw around and throwing people around. Kinda sadistic. Maybe tat's why I love it. x)) My performance = being the aggressor and being thrown by a guy doing self defence arts with Judo. WOW!

Ate dinner after it. Macs. Btw..had my lunch before going 2nd lecture.(like anyone of you would had ask. =/ )

And today ended. 12 midnight. Sleep early then.

(Please tag if you read my blog.)

Holidays

Starting to hate holidays. The pace is completely different. I'm a total different guy during holiday. Should i blame it on the holidays or myself then?.. Hmm.. *deep thoughts*

I'm drained. I have no energy for anything at all. Stil remember the book that I borrowed for Polalion. Talking about energies inside a human's body. Humans gain energies from others' energy. Energies in term of attentions. Good or Bad. Just attentions. Am I lacking from attentions? or had I been giving away too much of my energies?

LoLs! Funny for me phrase it this way. Well, I have no idea. Maybe I'm tired. Drained. x)) This few days. Games and games. Time passed quickly. No complaints. (from me. but there is alot from others.) No dates. No activities. No exercises. Skipping meals. Getting abit sick. Step out of houses once a day only. Life's simple.

Am I such a guy? Somehow or rather, I'm satisfied just like that. Stressless. But it's because of my laptop, because of the network connection,because of the power supply, because of the food, because of the water, because of etc. None are provided by my single-handedly. Just a spoiled brat now.

Good to get spoiled. Good to slack around yet things get done themselves. Good to get sick for reasons to slack. Bad personality. =_=" HA!

Seems to know what I should do for myself.

ANother Break!

Ha! Another week of break now. Actually, it should consider 3rd week of break, as I was slackinng through it. No mood for anything except for games. No mood. Games can really make me forget about the real world I'm in now. Games can be replayed when it was done badly or when you lost it. How relaxing it is.

Been seeking advices from people. LoLS! Interesting to hear from some of my friends. Their theories are good. From breaking up to holding on. Ha! From holding on to looking out for other target. x)) wonder what she will think if I tell her this. =P beetter nooot. lols -pause-

okie..just came back from meeting her. lols. She seems so sianz today. Must be due to too much high-ness the past few days. Rest more!! Im so wet now. The rain is so nice. hmmm..will I get sick? x)